I was watching Intervention last night. I watch it mainly because I can relate to it through my parents, sisters, friends, and even my own husband’s addictions and how they can rule every decision you make. I enjoy the happy endings more than anything, but last night something struck me for the first time. What could Jesus do for these people?!
I have watched the show for several years, and even applied to the show for my mother once. My brother once told me when I was talking about the show; our life is One Big Intervention. We have watched our mother in the last 2 years have overdose after overdose, with no solution to the problem, because she didn’t want one. We have sat by her in the hospital while she is totally confused and belligerent. We have seen her forget who we are, and call us by other names. We have sat with her and a psychiatrist and begged her to stop! For months we watched her slowly killing herself, and didn’t know, each time, if it would be the last. As cold as it may sound, I prayed for her to die! I prayed for God to take her! I wanted her to stop hurting, but I also wanted her to stop hurting us!
My mother has rheumatoid arthritis and has a need of pain meds to help with the pain that comes from this illness. But she has abused them for several years, going through withdrawals monthly. We had prayed and prayed for something to happen for her rock bottom, and we still aren’t sure if she has truly hit it, but for now she is clean.
By clean I don’t mean sober, but she is moderating the amount she takes and not abusing them like before. We think it may have been something with her ongoing heart health issues, and that she will already be on medication for the rest of her life for that.
But more than anything I know it is God! I feel Him in this, and I know what he can do! I know he has talked with her, and possibly shown her what this is not only doing to her, but to everyone around her; especially her grandkids. Being an addict is the most selfish disease in this world, and I do not know how anyone can come through it without knowing and feeling the power of God.
Since I have come back into a relationship with Jesus I can not imagine ever going back to living without Him, so it is difficult to see how much those people are needing something to fill the void in their lives and want to yell at them to start down a real path of healing and recovery with Him as the center!!!
I watched and thought about the people who turn down the chances they get or relapse during treatment, and I was just extremely curious if they had known or found God during their recovery. I have found Him and am constantly working on my recovery, but without Him I might be sitting in their shoes, and I will never forget that He has Saved me from that! So I say simply this, Thank You God for creating your own type of intervention for me! Thank You for surrounding me with the people who care enough to help me find my way back to You! Thank You for letting me see how much you work in everyone’s lives, so that I can catch a glimpse as to what you have in store for the rest of mine!
Friday, June 26, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
A little about me!
F'ing frogs!!! My life is one big intervention!
My name is Sarah; I am a faithful believer in Jesus Christ first and foremost! My daughter, Zoe is the 2nd most important person to me. 3rd is my family, as screwed up as we all are. I do mean all, so that also includes me as well. I am so proud to say that my sister, my brother and I have restored a relationship between us that was torn by the trials of our parent's addictions and bitterness. They were never really truly present in much of our lives, and still aren't. Being raised by a mother who wasn't 'all there' is very hard to overcome for one child, yet alone three, and not having your father there, and blaming you for it, just adds to it. The only way I can say that we did it was through Jesus, and that is the only way we still get through it - only now we also have each other.
I was saved when I was 13, before my mom took a major turn in her addiction. Before we really knew what was starting to happen to her! I am completely overwhelmed today with what God had Saved me from! In the next 2 years, I would only start to 'notice' my Mom's addiction. And it wasn't until the last 2 years that we truly started to see how bad her's and my father's addictions have truly taken control of their lives and really started affecting ours.
In the last 2 years I have watched my mother and father try and tear our family apart by their choices, rather their addictions choices. Watched my mother's addiction take advantage of all of us and worst of all my Grandmother who is fighting breast cancer, and had to deal with a dying marriage that I was fighting so hard to save, only to be shot down by my husband who didn't care enough to kill ALL his frogs and keep me. I found my way back to God again during that marriage though, and also got a beautiful daughter from it. If nothing else it teaches me to be stronger and helps me make decisions that will make my daughter's life so much better. It helps me be a better mother, sister, and friend, but above ALL else a better Christ-follower!
If I didn't have Jesus back then, I am not sure where I would be today, and especially if He wasn't there for me NOW. If one person can get through everyone in their life being affected and consumed by the most selfish disease, then there is only one answer to how that person can keep going, and God is that reason. When you put Him first, then every hurt and every blessing become clear in the perspective of what He is doing in your life, and what He is preparing you for.
Thank you God for my life! I ask that you bless others as you have blessed me, because without my blessings the hurts, habits, and hang-ups in my life would consume me. I thank you for all you do in my life good and bad to make me a stronger person, and I ask you bless anyone reading this with Your Love.
My name is Sarah; I am a faithful believer in Jesus Christ first and foremost! My daughter, Zoe is the 2nd most important person to me. 3rd is my family, as screwed up as we all are. I do mean all, so that also includes me as well. I am so proud to say that my sister, my brother and I have restored a relationship between us that was torn by the trials of our parent's addictions and bitterness. They were never really truly present in much of our lives, and still aren't. Being raised by a mother who wasn't 'all there' is very hard to overcome for one child, yet alone three, and not having your father there, and blaming you for it, just adds to it. The only way I can say that we did it was through Jesus, and that is the only way we still get through it - only now we also have each other.
I was saved when I was 13, before my mom took a major turn in her addiction. Before we really knew what was starting to happen to her! I am completely overwhelmed today with what God had Saved me from! In the next 2 years, I would only start to 'notice' my Mom's addiction. And it wasn't until the last 2 years that we truly started to see how bad her's and my father's addictions have truly taken control of their lives and really started affecting ours.
In the last 2 years I have watched my mother and father try and tear our family apart by their choices, rather their addictions choices. Watched my mother's addiction take advantage of all of us and worst of all my Grandmother who is fighting breast cancer, and had to deal with a dying marriage that I was fighting so hard to save, only to be shot down by my husband who didn't care enough to kill ALL his frogs and keep me. I found my way back to God again during that marriage though, and also got a beautiful daughter from it. If nothing else it teaches me to be stronger and helps me make decisions that will make my daughter's life so much better. It helps me be a better mother, sister, and friend, but above ALL else a better Christ-follower!
If I didn't have Jesus back then, I am not sure where I would be today, and especially if He wasn't there for me NOW. If one person can get through everyone in their life being affected and consumed by the most selfish disease, then there is only one answer to how that person can keep going, and God is that reason. When you put Him first, then every hurt and every blessing become clear in the perspective of what He is doing in your life, and what He is preparing you for.
Thank you God for my life! I ask that you bless others as you have blessed me, because without my blessings the hurts, habits, and hang-ups in my life would consume me. I thank you for all you do in my life good and bad to make me a stronger person, and I ask you bless anyone reading this with Your Love.
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